The Bigger, Better Person…

Sometimes in situations where you’re about to get into an argument with someone dear to you… someone else interferes, or an inner voice tells you: "Be the Bigger, Better person!"

I’ve always tried to be that person; to absorb the situation in order to avoid tension, arguments & confrontations that put relationships on edgy spots…

However, I’ve come to realize that being the Bigger, Better person has its downfalls…

And the word relationship here is a pretty wide term that shouldn’t be linked to male-female relationships; I’m speaking about any social relationship that could exist! In the same time, I'm not referring to anyone in particular, it's just a general feeling that has unfortunately been overwhelming me lately...

People assume you’ll always be that person who doesn’t complain… the person who exists to take the crap of others… the person who will always take initiative: call first, smile first, be nicer, keep in touch…

Honestly it’s starting to piss me off a bit…

I mean… someone else can try being the Bigger, Better person for a change…

Sometimes I wanna be the person whose feelings are taken into consideration and taken care of; I want to be pampered and I wanna be the person who complaints, I want to be the person who people take effort to ask about and keep in touch with…

Someone else can make sure peaceful relationships are maintained… ‘cause for some reason being that Bigger, Better person leads people to think you never get upset... sometimes you even don't exist!

I’m sorry but NO!

In fact, when I keep being that person, I come to a point when I just EXPLODE for no good reason and I turn from the Bigger, Better person to the EVIL person and for some reason people don’t get why I’ve exploded ‘cause I never complained before...

So obviously I won’t change overnight…

But UNFORTUNATELY, although I love being that person 'cause I don't mind making compromises or sacrifice for the people I love (in fact I love it and it's who I really am), I’ll just learn to draw the line at some point ‘cause apparently the Bigger, Better person is taken for granted & forgotten about and people don’t appreciate it… and that just hurts!

Forgiveness...

Well... forgiveness is a power and a skill that I personally think when you have it is a blessing...

I'm not claiming I'm talented at it... or that I always manage to forgive the people that hurt or upset me, but to a very large extent I am a forgiving person most of the time...

However, I gotta admit that lately there are some stuff that I just couldn't let go... some stuff that have just left a deeply rooted print in my feelings & memory that I couldn't manage to let go... and it's not because I can't forgive whoever that person is, but it’s because they don't try to ask for forgiveness... like they're asking you to accept it and live with it... which as a matter of fact sucks and hurts even more!

I'm not saying that I haven't been the one to hurt some people before... of course I've been there and done that and I probably did it a lot... both intentionally and unintentionally... but every single time I do and realize I did, I always go back and ask for forgiveness... true some people don't accept it... and that hurts a lot; to know that you've hurt someone you care about that way... but I know deep down inside they do appreciate the fact that I care to apologize and ask for it.... because that's how I feel when someone does; and in the end of the day we're all human!

I just think people should apologize and ask for forgiveness to show that they care... and I believe that if someone does apologize the other person should accept it, 'cause we all hurt people along the way in some way or the other... and we all need a second chance to make things better...