A Perfectly Wasted First Experience...

There are certain experiences we go through in life that we create certain dreams for... We create this vision for them and we imagine how they would happen...

And I'm not quite sure reality turns out to be as is....

These experiences could be...

Your first day of university classes...

The first car you drive... 

Your first date...

Your first relationship...

Your first job...

Your first pay roll...

And actually we put in great effort imaging how this thing would be and go about... 

But usually this experience comes and goes... 

And you'd hate it!

And you keep wishing you have done it differently....
Waited longer...
Been wiser....
Saved it for the best... 

You feel that your special first experience has gone completely in waste...

And it's annoying...

And frustrating...

And disappointing...

And you don't know if you're upset the experience didn't go well...
Or if your vision of that "first time experience" didn't go as you planned....
Or if you are are to blame for it being a flop...

But point is this first experience is GONE and NOT COMING BACK...
We are entitled to some crying over it...
But no crying would actually undo it and give you a second chance at changing the facts...

But then you wipe your tears...
Get up...
Tell yourself more and better experiences are yet to come...
You pray for forgetfulness...
And the ability to let go...
And the ability to move on...

And eventually we do...
We might not forget...
But we learn to live with the facts of this experience...
Try to learn from it...
Avoid it...
And hope the second on is better...
Maybe the third...

BUT in the end of the day...
Maybe we shouldn't worry about the first experience...
But rather one that would last because this is the one we live with... 

My Sanctuary...

Each person has his or her sanctuary… the place where they feel most comfortable and probably safe.

Well, my sanctuary is "my car!”

It may seem ridiculous to many people that a person driving in Cairo would consider their car their sanctuary given the traffic jams, the stress, the crazy drivers, the crazy pedestrians, and frequently the crazy animals…

But I just LOVE it!

I’d have to agree though that I can’t consider this sanctuary exactly safe, but let me tell you why…

My car is the only place where I’m completely alone… I don’t hate being around people, but sometimes I just like being alone…

Sometimes I just need a private moment with myself and I feel like my life lacks any sort of privacy, I don’t have any time just for me; there are always people around…

In my car I can:

• Talk to myself as much as I want,
• Think as much as I want (given the traffic and long hours spent there, I get a good opportunity to think),
• Plan my day,
• Make my calls (since I’m not comfortable speaking on the phone around people), 
• Listen to music, 
• Listen to the corny music I used to hear back in school (lol),
• Sing aloud when I feel like it (regardless of how bad my voice is), 
• Cry on tensed days, 
• Roll down the windows and let the air hit me (on relatively empty days),
• Think aloud, 
• Laugh aloud, 
• Trash talk other drivers as much as I want, 
• Speed up if I want to… 

I can’t explain I guess, but it’s just “me, myself and I.” I love who I am when I’m alone in my car… if that makes any sense… In fact it’s sometimes the highlight of my day… the time of day I look forward to… it’s my escape… it’s “ME TIME!”

Sometimes my favorite day is a day when I have a long drive, traffic is smooth, windows rolled down, music playing & I'm singing like no one is watching :)

My car is my sanctuary… and I love it!