What If?

I woke up on my usual Friday morning, determined to spend it watching my so called Grey's Anatomy new episode. And it always amazing when you watch something and it triggers something deep with in! You relate it to it... and you often feel like it answered something that you've always searched for an answer for.

Now I know... it sounds like I'm a medical drama sound philosophical! I'm not!

Basically this episode, episode 8x13 called "If, Then," (whether you're a fan of Grey's Anatomy or not) is about the what/if scenarios we create in our minds. If these things were to happen, how would our lives turned out? What if I had a different family? Fell in love with another guy? Had a different best friend? Or simply had a different life?

So this episode basically shows you how these characters' lives would've been IF thing were different!

And like anyone else in the world, we got into these  story-lines, assuming things can be different or will be different... BUT in the end of the day your DESTINY always kicks in. Regardless how different the story-line is... things will end up as planned for you.

In my personal life, I'm a pro at creating What/If scenarios... I almost always wonder what if I acted differently? Said something differently? Been more patient? Been less caring? Kept my thoughts for my self?Had better temper? Was less emotional? Was more outgoing? Had a different lifestyle?  Lived elsewhere? And the list goes on....

But apparently... what's meant to happen always happens.... the ending is the same. No matter how much we try to change it around.... Regardless of the what/if situations we create your  destiny in the end will prevail.... if something was meant to end well it will and if something was meant to go wrong it would.... If you're meant to end up with some one, you will and if someone is meant to hurt you, he/she will. If you were destined to get the job, you will and if you were destined to be fun and charming you will.

So may be rather than creating these live time illusions that we immerse ourselves in we make the best of the lives we have... because what/ifs almost never happens unless it was determined to happen anyways!

26 Things I Have AND Have Not Done Before Turning 26!

Well, I'm turning 26 today... I'm less depressed than I was when I turning 25. Anyways, I thought why not do a random checklist of the stuff I have and have not done before turning 26!

HAVE DONE - proudly or sadly, but mostly proudly!

1. Lived in two countries; Saudi Arabia and Egypt
2. Had friends from across the globe
3. Acted, directed and wrote plays
4. Finished my BA and MA
5. Gave a speech on behalf of my graduation class
6. Been angry to the extent that I smash something across a wall
7. Para sailed
8. Laughed till I cried
9. Got addicted (literally) to a show: Grey's Anatomy
10. Was titled funniest and most talented girl in high school
11. Drove while sleeping 
12. Obsessed over / fell for someone I never met!
13. Had three different jobs
14. Been broke, completely
15. Been mugged! 
16. Been in a major accident, and lived :) gladly
17. Done stupid and REALLY (okay really) foolish things for love! 
18. Fell for the wrong guys... OVER and OVER again! 
19. Read the same book at least 200 times
20. Made great friends and lost people who were supposed to be great friends! 
21. Fell in love with sushi suddenly
22. Read a novel over night
23. Sang and danced while driving 
24. Created imaginary stories in my head and lived with them for a while
25. Hated someone then became their very good friend
26. Started a blog

HAVE NOT DONE ~ and should have done!

1. Read the Bible entirely 
2. Had a surprise birthday party, I always figure out before they happen 
3. Done something completely insane and crazy 
4. Ditched classes 
5. Gone shopping with nothing but a fully loaded credit card 
6. Got an F in a course 
7. Learned German and French 
8. Watched Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings!
9. Been in a relationship 
10. Been on a date
11. Been to the movies alone
12. Gone clubbing or been drunk 
13. Partied late 
14. Tried any type of drug 
15. Reached my ideal weight 
16. Traveled around the world 
17. Seen snow 
18. Danced in the rain 
19. Gone swimming with my clothes on (don't ask me why it seems appealing) 
20. Caught the bouquet in a wedding 
21. Lied about where I'm spending the night 
22. Published a book 
23. Been good in a sport 
24. Learned drumming 
25. Saved money 
26. Drove faster than 120 Km/Hour

Procrastination Queen...

I think if there is an award for the number one world procrastinator I would really have a BIG shot at winning. I honestly have a major problem at getting important things done. I manage to waste time pretty much doing everything and anything except what I should be doing...

Let's take today as an example... I woke up 9:30 a.m. with a 100% intention that I'd focus on my thesis... I promised myself I'd make use of this week, that God has gifted me with, in order to finish my thesis... So my agenda for today's thesis included:

• Reviewing at least a 100 surveys in order to remove invalid ones
• Data entry of at least 80 surveys 
• Reviewing my intro and literature review for spelling and grammatical errors

I've promised myself that I'd get this done, and if I finish those I'd take the rest of the day off, have a little fun and do my 1 hour workout that I promised myself I'd do...

Anyhow, it's 4:40 pm and this is what I've done so far in my day:

• 10:00 - 10:30 fooling around with my sister's new iPad
• 10:30 - 10:45 drinking coffee
• 10:45 - 12:00 decided I'd re-design how my blog looks
• 12:00 - 12:30 walking around home, talking to family, eating a banana 
• 12:-30 - 1:20 watching latest episode of Desperate Housewives
• 1:20 - 2:00 Facebook-ing and Twitter-ing 
• 2:00 - 3:00 lunch 
• 3:00 - 3:45 watching yesterday's Grey's Anatomy episode
• 3:45 - 4:15 FINALLY I reviewed 20 surveys
• 4:15 - 4:35 coffee "break" and more Facebook-ing and Twitter-ing 
• 4:35 - now since my status was on FB and Twitter was that I'm a pro at wasting time, I ended up here, writing this...

So... Ya... I'm the queen of procrastination... Sadly, I can't even being to explain how much I need to focus and get my work done... I honestly have to. This 10 day holiday is really my savior to finishing my Masters and I have to use it well.. 

Point is, when I end up wasting time, neither do I get the job done nor do I have fun. I'm just stuck at home under the illusion that I'm working, when I'm not. So really, if I'm home, I should get it done.. If I plan to procrastinate, I should just get up, go out and have some real fun!

Needless to say that I just bought a novel on Wednesday and it's sitting right next to me now and I'm fighting temptation not to grab it and start reading!

Now that I've let out my anger towards my poor time management skills, I'm hoping I really get back and do what I planned for to do at the beginning of this day.

And I hope I get my one hour workout! I need it too! 

C ya :) 

~ Let's say it would take me another 15 mins to color and format this post... plus I hear some fight in the street that I'm going to check out. Hopefully by 5 pm, I'll be back on track! At least I'm a queen at something, lol!