More to Life...

Lately all I do is think and evaluate...

I won't complain my life isn't dramatic or heartbreaking... I've done well on some fronts.... I understand some people have bigger, more disturbing issues and problems when compared to me... YET... when I look at my life, flashback and think... all that comes to mind is: WHAT THE HELL!? There has got to be MORE to life than THIS!

I think I've gone along in life too serious, too boring... too safe!

When I look at my life at 26 I'm sure there is a lot more to life than family, getting educated, working like a freak, more education, more work, shopping, going to the movies, the internet, soap operas, and sitting in a restaurant with friends...

All these are "good" stuff... but they're basics... pure basics... the normal boring stuff! The stuff you do and say: BLEH! And unfortunately my life is full of those!

But I don't have these insane, outgoing, crazy, adventurous, once in life time experience that I look back to and tell myself: I've lived my life to the fullest...

Unfortunately to me... I haven't lived my life to the fullest... probably not even a quarter full!

And yes... some stuff (that I prefer not getting into) have contributed to the "Bleh Lifestyle" that I have been destined to BUT for once I gotta say I take a huge part of the blame for that... they say: you're in charge of your own life... And I've probably been unsatisfied with my life for at least the last 6 years and I don't think it change a bit...

All I know is there has got to be more to life than THIS! And there has to be something I can do about it than hope that it changes! Although I wish it DOES change on its own.

There is MORE to Life.
More, that I'd like to one day see.
Some day... I GOT to look back and tell myself: WOW! I've lived life to the FULLEST!

The Beautiful ME and YOU...

Regardless of how we feel sometimes... we get our low esteem moments... our falls... our high peeks of self criticism... and the fact that we sometimes hate no one BUT ourselves... the FACT and the truth is... both me and you have a beautiful and amazingly kick ass side to us!

What kindda annoys me though... is that sometimes we try hard to hide the beautiful side to us because worried we'd seem corny... we like to appear as the strong, careless, arrogant, self centered JERKS we think we are...

Fact is... deep down I know I'm beautiful inside... and I know YOU are beautiful inside...

Sometimes I'd be sitting with a highly qualified "jerk" and outta the blue that person forgets that he or she has to give this uptight and annoying attitude and BINGO I see their beautiful side...

This beautiful ME and YOU moment could be: a simple smile, a statement about how much we love our moms, giving a homeless child something to eat, calling our little brother or sister because we're worried they're late, keeping a picture of our ex in our wallet, helping an old lady cross the street, bragging about how much we'd love to turn out like our dads, humming a cute romantic song, getting caught daydreaming and smiling, admitting that we sometimes cry, admitting that we actually forgave the person who hurt us the most, admitting that if we could actually tell that person that we did forgive them we would, that we still keep our teddy bear from childhood, that we still check our ex's Facebook page everyday, that we cry in movies, that flowers make our day, that we're suckers for chocolate, that our best friend is our dream man/woman, that our mom's food is the best thing we've ever tasted...

The list can go on forever...

The beautiful me and you moment, is a moment we don't plan for, a moment when we're lost in time... HOWEVER it can change how we see each other... It allows you to know something about me that you didn't know don't know... it allows me to see you from a different perspective... It is something that makes us both smile!

So... should we still care we look corny?!? I say NO! Let the beautiful me and you shine! Let it grow... Trust me being beautiful inside and letting it show is a lot better than being a jerk :)